My daughter's wedding in Italy had been planned for over a year. We were going to use the opportunity it provided to get the whole family together for two weeks. I found a villa that accommodate our three families and we looked forward to spending time together. Unfortunately my son's illness through late June and most of July threw a 'spanner in the works'. Neither he nor his mum could make the journey and my daughter's husband also had to work. In spite of the fact that we could not all be together as a family we had a very good experience. In particular, my two youngest daughter's were able to spend a lot of time with their older step sister, stepbrother and his wife, and their four nephews. They were stars helping out wherever possible. I witnessed a side to their character that I had not seen before. In turn they were able to bond with B, S & J and the babies and gain some valuable experience in looking after infants. The wedding itself was a wonderful experience in a wonderful setting at times it felt like a carnival. The occasion forced me to look back on my daughter's life and it gave me a chance to tell the world how proud I was of her.
This is the first time I have felt able to record my thoughts and feelings. It's been a very difficult even traumatic few weeks for me and my family as we have had to cope with the ordeal of a member of the family becoming very ill a long way from home. My wife bore the brunt of it and has stayed close by him throughout. It has been an emotional rollercoaster and we have had to cope with the situation and deal with the worst imaginable scenarios. Thankfully he is getting better although progress is very slow. The experience has taught me once again that good health and mental, physical and emotional ability are just the most important things in life and how much we take them for granted day to day until they are removed. Its revealed an aspect of my wife's character and strength I knew would be there but which can only ever going to reveal itself in such situations. It's revealed the love and concern of our family and close friends. I think the ordeal has made our family stronger. It's given me experience and insights into life in intensive care something I have never experienced before and the enormous dedication, professionalism and kindness of clinical staff. But also seeing life on the wards and experiencing the frustrations as a parent of not being able to get the care and attention you need when you need it for your child and seeing just how much you have to fight sometimes to get the attention you need. Coping with the uncertainty of not knowing what was causing my son's illness was one of the hardest of things until you realise that it's almost academic and the most important thing is to treat the illness by every means until there is a positive response. Google also played its role in provided much needed but not wanted information on the possible conditions and outcomes we were dealing with.
I know the experience has had a significant impact on my feelings - at times totally drained of energy and numb while at other times overjoyed and everything in between. At the moment I am just thankful that we are where we are now and not where we were three weeks ago and I appreciate all that so many people have done to help him and us through the ordeal.
To develop my understandings of how I learn and develop through all parts of my life by recording and reflecting on my own life as it happens.
I have a rough plan but most of what I do emerges from the circumstances of my life